What we think

As I sit here watching the news that show billions of dollars spent so far in the holiday rush while at the same time desicussing the looming possibility of rising taxes with the upcoming fiscal cliff I start to wonder, what are our perceptions of reality? Now this might just be me but I have come to know that we all do not live on one rational plain. How do I know this? Because I am part of a couple.

All of you out there who have a long term partnership will know what this means. In their world  your eating habits are strange, in yours it's unhygienic to eat the piece of the French fry that touches your fingers. I your world The Hobbit is just a book, that you never read, while in theirs it's a family obsession. (yes these are real quirks) but what to do when the perceptions become deeper?

Here we enter the real issue, what do you do when the real world is to honest?

If you have ever experienced a physical disability or "visible" illness you will understand, for those of you who don't know this is any of those illnesses that make you stop and do a double take in a public place maybe with a " wow they look bad"  or " what do you think they have?" thrown in. Dont shrink behind your monitor you know you have done this at least one. And you know what? For the most part the person you talked about could hear you, yes they could, and they just didnt care. 

It happens, we get used to it, and we tone you out. because that's the code right? People will look, point, mutter, and stare. You will pretend not to see. There are lines of course, socially expectable harmless stupid comments and questions vs. the ones you never ask. 
Example: wow does that hurt? (you might want to give a snide comment but they ask because there worried and curious) Vs.   Man that looks like shit! You shouldn't go out like that, it looks like it hurts. (this person can be given the snide comment)

But the major taboo holds. Never talk to someone about a sick friend or relative, with them in the room, as though that person is not there. And while we might know the worst that those around us might think. 

Example: Mother to son dating a chronicle Ill girl: are you sure this is a good idea? I mean there are so many girls out there that aren't this much work! What are you getting into? ( don't laugh this happened to a friend) 

While we might know the though exists and even except it, wonder it deep down ourselves, what happens when the golden rule is broken and these things a said in front of the person in question? Can you come back from that?

This Republic of Suffering

While this was a school read I am so glad it came my way! This Republic of Suffering: Death and the American Civil War by Drew Gilpin Faust is a masterpiece for historical lovers and the general public alike. Covering not the war in common terms of battles and troop movements but through the real loss sustained on individual and state levels Faust peels back the patriotic veneer that covers our modern understanding of these long lost "war dead". In this was This Republic, while not the most uplifting read, opens up the past back up to modern eyes and allows us to see through the mass of suffering at a more understandable level. With all the Civil War events in the years to come read this before stepping on the battlefields to understand these brave men better. If the book doesn't seem your thing there is a documentary based off the work by the title Death and the Civil War: Amewrican Experience that does a good job of covering the condensed material for a more visual audience.

austenland

Well another book down millions more to go! Austenland is in fact the first book on tape I listened to in a beta test of listing to new filler books on the long drive to class. It worked well except at some points the writer had me so interested in this Jane austen themed comidy/romance that I wasn't really sure how I had ended up in my driveway at the end of the night.

The book follows a women in her early thirtys who has become more and more disheartened by a string of bad relationships. As each one failed she slips just a tad bit farther in love with Mr. Darcy, and really who can blame her? But the relationship with her fictional ideal is running her real life into the ground. So, with some help from a recently departed relative, don't worry they weren't that close, she sets off to a land where she can live out her fanticy of Mr. Right and come home in three weeks to her real life and give up on love for good. I mean how much can happen in three weeks? Well at Pemberly Park apparently quite a lot.

A great read, but challenging if you haven't in fact read any Austen while that seems to go without saying I will anyway. The author also references Jane Eyre though it is in passing. Overall a fun and witty work for any classics lovers out there!

Crossed

Well I have finnished Crossed the sequal to Matched by Ally Condie. I have to say that Matched in itself was just a beach read and that it filled that role wonderfully. however, matched while nice was not as of the same calleber as its predeceser. Crossed seems to lose some of the human element held in matched as we read the wondering and fragmented thoughts of ky and Cassia in alternating chapters. to be fair I dont personally care for books that switch points of view every chapter but in this case there are times when the minds of the two charectures are hard to tell apart from one another without the aid of the chapter headings. perhaps this is because they seem to both spend the entire book whining and cryptically looking back over there lives as they wonder through a dessert with no plan that can be seen. In this way Crossed was a sad let down, and for someone looking for reading that wouldn't interrupt the sound of waves that bar was fairly low. Here is hoping that the third book will be better.

Grade: C-

Little Century

   
A must read! Another teenage girl story for all of you out there. when her mother dies unexpectedly Ester is left to figure out her life on her own. she choices to take the chance to move to the frontier with a distant cousin she has never met. Ester takes her chances in the wilds of America at the turn of the century with nothing but the will of youth and the spirit of change coursing through the country on the eve of a new day. Ester might not get everything right but you will turn the pages and hold your breath through the life changes and murder mystery to come!

Grade: A+

Matched

This book was fun. That's about all, it didn't change my world view or in-rich my mind but it was quick and easy. The perfect beach read for someone overwhelmed and wanting to unwind just like I was. Matched looks at a distopian society, so in right now, and the effects its confines have on one teenage girl. apparently hormones don't stop in the future either and Cassia gets a good dose of em' when her prearranged match goes wrong. She not only sees the face of her best friend and match on her screen but that of another boy....
what is a teenage girl to do in a society monitered by statistical probability?

Grade: Beach Read

The Number: a completely different way to think about the rest of your life.

Well that's what it really is nowadays isn't it? retirement isent just a stepping stone to old age and death, far from it. the "r" word, as Eisenberg calls it, is now close to a second half to your lifespan. so how do you want to spend it? what, you mean by 30 at the latest you haven't thought of that? didn't think that was something that mattered, or if it did only in a slightly buzzing kind of way. well Eisenberg is here to tell you that, sorry, it is important and not just later but right now!
dont be alarmed The Number wasent written to scare you or tell you that everyone needs three mill. to make it through life without the buggy man coming for you. it was however, written for those in there late twentys to early thirtys as a way to really look at finance or more importantly what you want finance for.
while there is no magic grid to simply tell you how much you will need to put away, in what way, and for how long there are some simple facts about investment, how much should you really have in stocks and how much in bonds, and some tough life choices to make. what is retirement to you if you really had to think about it?
My answer was easy: becoming the wondering vagabond of my dreams with a simple but comfortable home that can be a base of operations from which to pack the next suitcase. while the book is longish it is an easy read, written not for those in the know, but for those who don't know anything. once you pick it up you might just get hooked like me and end up wondering why you never thought of such logical points about your own future happiness!

Sway

Book Day!!!!!!! I just love posting about new books becouse I read book blogs all the time to catch up on something new. Today I finnished SWAY: The irresistible pull of irrational behavior written by Ori Brafman and Rom Brafman. The book was just suppost to be a placefiller in all honisty and I did not expect that it would become much more. Shockingly this became a book I couldnt put down! It could be the most stimulating read thats passed my door in quit awhile. focusing on aspects of the brain from how we react to group dynamics to what fairness realy means this book will get you thinking. Good for those with a background in psychology as well as those simply reading for fun this book truely toes the line between entertainment and education.

Grade: A

First Ever Book Review

My very first Thursday book review! like everything else about this blog I'm sure this new segment will evolve in the future but for today I have chosen to share  the book Mop Men: inside the world of crime scene cleaners by Alan Emmins. Not a normal summer read I agree but an interesting one never the less. Alan, a journalist, finds that his latest story pitches are not hitting the mark in today's media and looks for a new angle to pitch. In a roundabout way Alan moves to California to follow Neal, the owner of crime scene cleaners and his crew of merry moppers.

While the book can be graphic for the everyday reader I found the book to be more disheartening. Alan spends most of the book, in my opinion, looking down on those who treat death with a casual manner. He seems at times to feel superior to many of those around him while he works on the sidelines of jobs under Neal's company. This attitude is directed at times to the police working the crime scene, the other cleaners, those who work for motels or hotels where suicides are more common, and most often at Neal.

While I see how those who have not been exposed to death or first responders could misinterpret there reactions to death I find it sad that Alan never seems to fully comprehend the shift in there thinking or to stop holding his own attitude as the only "acceptable" model. in fact he at times seems afraid that he might have gone to some kind of dark side for thinking like those around him. If you have a loved one who is in a first responder field you might want to simply bypass this book for this reason.

While the overall book in interesting and holds some interesting incite it in no way compares to Stiff: the curious lives of human cadavers, a great read,  who's shoes I got the feeling it modeled.  All in all one that can be skipped

C rated.